What Other People Take for a Given (sort of my daily post about religion)

I don't particularly recommend Radical Religion in American: Millenarian Movements from the Far Right to the Children of Noah to anyone looking for a light read. More than anything it reads like a PhD thesis, although the use of "!" in various places would indicate a very forgiving doctoral advisor/committee. But his encompassing thesis regarding the Children of Noah, various groups on the radical right, and a look at how watchdog groups both monitor and shape other groups (perhaps the most interesting ideas he presents), are very interesting. There are a few surprising bits of information that were new to me that are worth sharing. In this post I'd like to address "The Vision of Washington." This isn't a vision of the state of Washington, nor a vision of Washington, D.C., but rather a vision of Washington the President and a vision by Washington the President if you believe he appeared to a revolutionary war solider in a dream with an apocalyptic warning, like some strange Virgil in Dante's Divine Comedy. The best summary of the actual dream can be found at Snopes, but I'll regurgitate and summarize based on Snopes and Radical Religion. Actually, why not quote - it's easier. Keep in mind, the point here is that there is a segment of society that believes not only that this is fact, but that it is such incontrovertible fact that it can be quoted to support portions of the Bible.

"Perhaps no better example of the process by which a specific doctrine is offered to the Identity community by a particular leader, considered through the diverse world of the Identity faithful, and then either rejected or forgotten or accepted as dogma can be given than the strange case of George Washington's prophetic vision for America. Washington's vision came to be widely accepted, an unquestioned tenet of belief among Identity adherents, only after a complex process of selection, hermeneutics, and dissemination. The actual origin of the story is impossible to reconstruct. According to the tale itself, the vision was related by one Anthony Sherman to Wesley Bradshaw on 4 July 1859. Mr. Sherman was at the time 99 years old—the precice age of Abraham when God bestowed upon him the Covenant in Gen. 17--and in 1777 was with George Washington at Valley Forge. The vision itself took the form of a dream, which Washington described to Sherman. In highly allusive language, Washington recounted that a singularly beautiful female came to him in his sleep, and addressing him as 'Son of the Republic,' guided him through a
series of apocalyptic visions whose central motif involved the American republic engulfed in the tribulations of war and famine. The cause of these fearful scenes was suggested by 'a shadowy angel,' who placed a trumpet to his mouth and blew three distinct blasts; and taking water form the ocean, he sprinkled it upon Europe, Asia and Africa.' From these continents arose a black and terrible cloud, which settled to earth and resolved into armed men 'who moving with the cloud, marched by land and sailed by sea to America, which...was enveloped by the volume of the cloud.' America is fated to survive this tribulation, according to the vision, only so long as the Republic keeps faith in God, the land, and the union." (p. 52-3)

Why should we hear about body bags and deaths? It's not relevant.

Claim: Former First Lady Barbara Bush said of the war in Iraq: "Why should we hear about body bags and deaths? It's not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that?"

Status: True.

Of course, with caveats...go read Snopes, the Wege does.

THEM: Adventures with Extremists

While on vacation I read THEM: Adventures with Extremists by Jon Ronson. I picked it up while looking for another book in the same section at the library, and it wasn’t until I was several dozen pages into it that I realized I had seen most of the content on television under the guise of Ronson’s documentary “Secret Rulers of the World”, which he did for Channel 4. Trio (TV), before my DirectTV dropped them, used to show all sorts of weird shows you couldn’t find anywhere else, and this was one of them – so as I read the book, I was actually having flashbacks to Ronson being tailed by the Bilderberg Group and the Bohemian Grove ceremony he was detailing. If you get a choice (between the series or the book), watch the series – it follows the book almost exactly and some of the visuals can’t be captured adequately in words.

Ronson is more of a humorist than anything else, and this makes the book, for all its content about fringe groups, self-proclaimed messiahs, the New World Order, and Satanic conspiracies, very light reading. He does a deft job of capturing the humanity of the people he interviews and in many cases you find yourself liking them, or at least liking their likeability despite their paranoia, racism and outright insanity. It takes a deft pen to apply that insight into people with whom Ronson himself generally does not feel comfortable.

Two of the things I learned while reading Them:

1. Extremist humor just isn’t that funny:

“Omar paused. ‘You know,’ he said, ‘the Koran even tells me which direction I must break wind in.’
There was a short silence.
‘And which direction do you break wind in?’ I asked.
‘The direction of the nonbeliever!’ Omar said.
‘Ha ha ha! The direction of the nonbeliever!’ Omar laughed heartily for some time and slapped me on the back.” (31).

2. KKK members now primarily wear cotton robes because silk robes have to go to the dry cleaners where minority drycleaners have a habit of losing them. There are several pages in Them where KKK members actually exchange fashion and washing tips (196-97).

Lance and George

You know - if Sheryl Crow were riding with them while wearing her MoveOn.org shirt, it might be worth watching.

"President Bush 's planned bike-off with Lance Armstrong tomorrow will be filmed exclusively by the Discovery Channel, sponsor of Armstrong's team. White House spokeswoman Dana Perino said the blowout -- er, bike ride -- will be closed to the media and a photo will be released."

Washington Post, by way of Wonkette

Amazon Reviews

Harriet Klausner on Amazon has writen 9608 book reviews (oop, 9615, she's up since last time I checked, two days ago), making her the most prolific reviewer on the system. I have read approximately 360 books in the last eleven (11) years. At my rate, it would take me somewhere in the neighborhood of 300 years to catch up with her record. I have my suspicions that Harriet is either a dummy account for autoposting summaries or a group of people who are willing to read almost anything as the last few reviews include a "fantastic teen amateur sleuth tale", a "spellbinding paranormal police procedural", a "deep character study of a Nazi butcher ", and a "fine Americana historical Christian tale".

Tax Songs (in case you filed an extension)

Paul L. Caron, over at TaxProf Blog recently had two posts up about tax songs - songs especially poignant for those lonely nights studying tax law, or doing your taxes, when you need a bit of theme music.

TaxProf links to Taxes Are Best When You Pay Nothing at All and Nickel Creek performing The Tax Man. But if you know a lawyer who lives for the law, you don't have to stop there. In the course of my work, I've been treated to two other tunes, "The Judge Song" and "I'm Billing Time", performed by the Bar & Grill Singers. You can listen to samples of many of their songs at their site and might be surprised to find they're really very melodious and enjoyable.

"The Bar & Grill Singers, all of whom are practicing attorneys in Austin, Texas, have entertained lawyers and non-lawyers since their 1991 debut in a one-performance musical revue. Now appearing year-round across the nation, the Singers spoof themselves and their profession with clever lyrics set to a variety of musical styles. They needle everything and everyone around the law, including clients, billing practices, legal ethics, bored jurors, and (gasp!) federal judges."

A Dose of Humor

Looks like David Neiwert over at Orcinus is moving away from journalism and into science fiction. Actually, it looks like he's having a bit of disturbing fun running with Rush Limbaugh's recent statement:

"Wouldn't it be great if anybody who speaks out against this country, to kick them out of the country? Anybody that threatens this country, kick 'em out.
We'd get rid of Michael Moore, we'd get rid of half the Democratic Party if we would just import that law. That would be fabulous. The Supreme Court ought to look into this. Absolutely brilliant idea out there."

and extrapolating out a declaration of liberal exclusion/unpatriation by the "Master of All Megadittoes".

For a more direct sort of humor that has only a slight moralizing about human nature within, check out Jack Handey's recent piece in the New Yorker, "What I'd Say to the Martians". When I got to the line, "You say your civilization is more advanced than ours. But who is really the more “civilized” one? You, standing there watching this cage? Or me, with my pants down, trying to urinate on you?", I felt as though it was a piece that might speak to my friend Klund.

Sit in the Corner

I' ve been posting a few things about Terry Pratchett books I've read lately - so for any Terry Pratchett fans who find their way here, I thought I'd include an author-related post from Boing Boing, pilfered in its entirety.

---

Cory Doctorow: Here's Terry Pratchett commenting on the Canadian court order forbidding customers of a book-store who got the new Harry Potter a few days early from discussing or even reading the book:

Now that the bound proof copies of _Thud!_ are out, and will no doubt be winging their way to an e-bay near you, I would like to say that ANYONE WHO READS A WORD OF IT before publication day will be MADE TO SIT IN THE CORNER and their ENTIRE COUNTRY will be given DOUBLE DETENTION until every single person SAYS SORRY!!!!! Link (via MiniLinks)

Ride of the Mergansers II - Free at the Walker

My friend Steve recently told me that his documentary, Ride of the Mergansers, will be showing at The Walker on Saturday, November 5th, for free (family film weekend). At that rate, even Klund can afford to take his family. I wonder if ducks are funnier drunk.

I don't see it listed on the Walker Calendar yet - but it's easy to watch for (rss and iCal) and I'll post a time if I find one.

Also, the Como Park Japanese Lantern Festival is coming up on August 21st - $5/person or $10/household and "Free parking at Bandana Square on Energy Park Drive with a free shuttle bus to and from the festival." Tall Brad loves the Japanese drums, so if you see a 6'8" guy wandering about, ask him if he's Tall Brad the blog star - he loves attention.

Sans Photo - Interior, SD

Sometimes, even when you have a camera available, you fail to take a picture of the things that most deserve a picture. It must be something you train yourself to do by incessantly carrying and using your camera at all times. During our recent vacation in South Dakota, we faced the prospect of a $250 hotel room because of the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. Deciding to travel further afield for cheaper digs, we contacted a motel in Interior, SD, right on the edge of the Badlands National Park. That hotel was full of bikers, but they have a cozy little network in Interior, and they just called around and found us an open room at the Badlands Inn. Our expectations were exceedingly low, so we were pleasantly surprised with the wonderful staff, the nice digs (not great digs, but two beds, clean, air conditioning, and nicer than some of the more expensive places we stayed), and the fact that it was a bit quieter than the Sturgis area proper.

However, before we got to the motel, we drove around town for a while first - and I use town in the loosest sense of the word. There were three hotels and a cafe/gift shop just inside the park, but the town of Interior itself is about a dozen severely dilapidated trailer homes, bleached by the sun and covered in thirty years of Badlands dirt, and a run down building or two that might be general goods or might be car repair - it's hard to tell just looking at the shop and/or yard. There was one other stand out building, the local bar - a small, dingy hut with windows so dirty you couldn't see in, just a general glow from inside, two obviously drunk, laughing Mexicans outside (could have been Hispanic Americans - difficult to say, and we didn't ask them), and the cause of their laughter - an older, slightly swaybacked, longhorn steer tied to a post by its reins, a saddle slung across its back. Based on the laughter and based on a gut perception that the cow wasn't just simply tied up there by the owner as a joke, Pooteewheet and I had to agree that it really looked as though someone had ridden a saddled, longhorn steer to the bar for a drink. Some people just won't let their spouse hiding the keys keep them down.

Not Quite the Same as Leaving a Cave

City Pages' Culture to Go has a short bit about the Jesus Video Project America's goal to put a copy of the movie Jesus in everyone's mailbox by 2040. It doesn't seem a heavenly inspired move to follow the lead of AOL/TimeWarner's saturation strategy, given their lackluster performance - and it seems even less likely that the phrase "saturation evangelism" will become the next great buzz phrase (the whole trend of mixing free market economics and religion gives me something of a headache), although receiving a random, watered-down call to faith does seem to fit right in with current trends (albeit in the UK).

"...the number of people who have a real faith is now smaller than the number of people who passively "belong" to a religion. That undermines a cherished tenet of churches in Britain: that many people implicitly "believe" even if they don't explicitly belong."

On a positive note, there's a good chance, based on the mobility of American households, that it'll be the people who owned the house before you, and the people you sold your last house to, that will get the copies of the video instead of you.

Mean Mr. Mustard and His Phallic Compensation

I missed this post on Planet Dan about a Cornell study that concluded, "Men who feel anxious about their masculinity are more likely to support war, buy SUVs and be hostile to gays..." Obviousness aside, one of my friends/coworkers drives a nice little pink, maybe purple, RAV with a no war in Iraq sticker on the mud flap and (at least previously) a kid's seat in the back, an example of which you can find here, at Kelly's website about crafting and antiquing (you can also see her kitties). I think Cornell needs to qualify their study with the words "large", "manly", "at least six cylinders" or some sort of cc qualifier before "SUV" lest I believe that's all the compensation Mr. Mustard can muster.

By the way, a shout out to the Mustard as he's on vacation this week, effectively putting me one car length closer to the front door each workday. It's like he left just for me.

G.W. Bush, Terry Pratchett, and a Wooden Horse

Did I mention Terry Pratchett might be using the Oxter English Dictionary to use words that provide no possible web-based method of verifying? Words related to the construction of models, like:

foryphy
smaradgine
skelsa
delphinet
shode

I'm not even sure he spelled smardgine correctly - as the closest thing I can find is smaragdine - of or relating to the color of emeralds. Keep that one handy for the New York Times crossword puzzle. And shode, well, he says a carefully worked model of a boat is inlaid with it, but it seems to mean waste/rubbish stone. So he's actually using those words to hide a joke. Bastard probably thinks he's funny.

That aside, Pyramids has been one of Pratchett's better Discworld books so far. I would have never thought that mocking Pharaohnic culture would be such rich and fertile literary ground. Portraying an "Egyptian" burial model maker as a geekboy living with his mother and obsessing on his boat models like some Star Wars fanatic - brilliant, right down to the mania for scales (the 1/80th kind, not the weighing kind). I thought the ending was a little soft, but overall it was extremely funny, and though written in 1989, still managed to make pointed fun of George W. Bush:

"It was that bloody wooden cow or whatever," said Xeno. "They've never forgiven us for it."

"If we don't attack them, they'll attack us first," said Ibid.

"S'right," said Xeno, "So we'd better retaliate before they have a chance to strike." (p. 215)

Barrel Roll

Don't let anyone tell you different - once you're in your mid-30s, doing a barrel/log roll down a large hill has the potential to make you violently ill, even if your daughter does think it’s pretty funny.

I notice I haven't been blogging much in the way of politics lately - but I was on vacation and moving air hockey tables. I shall endeavour to get something up along with a few book reviews I've been meaning to get to all weekend, Scout's Honor.

No Like Him

My daughter has a new enemy - Stone Cold Steve Austin. My brother, for some unknown reason, saw a Steve Austin straw "cup" on the way to Montana, and thought of me - not because I like wrestling or something apropos, just because. And Eryn absolutely hates it - she covers her face, runs for the corner and announces, "No like him!"

Doctor Doom (courtesy of Burger King happy meals), however, is just peachy, and two Doctor Dooms, well, they fight for a while, and then kiss and make up - which is way better than the movie.

South Dakota Vacation II - the Stupid Stuff

Elise might like to know that we all went to Reptile Gardens. I don't recommend going there if you haven't been - it's just not that exciting for $11/person. The alligator/snake guy was wonderful - he gave a pretty good show - but I don't know what birds had to do with any of it, other than that they eat snakes, and the "trained animal" show was horrifying in a beyond-kitsch sort of way. But they did have an interesting selection of animals and this one might interest Elise the most. I didn't take a picture of it, because it didn't seem to be in its cage - it was probably running around loose somewhere, paralyzing the staff and laying eggs on them.

We also saw this preserved stickbug from Malaysia. Every time I hear a story out of Malaysia it's about scorpions, boas in outhouses, mean monkeys and other nasty critters. I don't think this bug, almost twice as long as my hand, makes it any more attactive as a vacation destination.

Did I mention that I'm one sexy mother-f-er? This sort of thing helps Mean Mr. Mustard because it means he doesn't have to bother with photoshopping.

We were pulled over at one point during our travels. But I felt pretty stupid when Pooteewheet forced me to pay the ticket.

And this picture, well, it's only for those who can appreciate it. I didn't go because I was worried I'd bump into a co-worker (not because I was worried I'd bump into Steve Perry).

Finally - Eryn really enjoyed Wall Drug, particularly the T-Rex that roared so loud that she sprinted down a hallway and cowered in the corner until Pooteewheet carried her out. We didn't make it to Deadwood (Deadwood being full of Sturgis bikers) to see the really loud gunfights Mr. Mustard warned me about, but this seemed to fill that void for Eryn. Later, at lunch, she scribbled out the t-rex on the menu, scrubbing him off the menu with her pen while leaving everything else alone. We're very proud to have given her perhaps her first serious psychological trauma. Here are three pictures of me at Wall Drug. The first, of me making a mockery of my own Oglala heritage.

Then me on a jackalope while Erwood is forced to await her turn:

and then me annoyed because they fenced off anything fun to touch/photograph on the 80' dinosaur at Wall Drug.

South Dakota Vacation I - the Stupid Stuff

Pooteewheet, Eryn and I spent a full week traveling to Montana to visit my grandmother for her 90th birthday, and then moseying back across South Dakota to see the sites. Before we left we must have mentioned to a dozen people that we were going to miss the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally by a week and not one of them bothered to inform us we were woefully wrong and would be in South Dakota for the opening week - I prefer to think that I don't regularly hang with motorcyclists rather than that my friends thought it was funny I'd end up in South Dakota during a week when every hotel within over one-hundred miles of Sturgis (literally) was either booked or going at the low low rate of $250 for a rather sub-to-standard room, gas prices were elevated by 10-20 cents, and the roar of bikes was everywhere (particularly at 6:00 a.m.). But lack of available hotel rooms aside, we did manage to have a very good time - hopping from Jamestown, to New Salem, to Sidney, to Devil's ("Debil's" according to Eryn) Tower, to Rapid City and Mount Rushmore ("the four faces"), to the Bad Lands, to Sioux Falls (um...yeah), and home, and the motorcycles actually added a bit of local color that we probably won't experience again. I'm pretty sure Pooteewheet will blog the happy family pictures, so I'm going to stick to the stupid pictures my friends (Mr. Mustard, Elise from After School Snack, Klund, Ming, TallBrad, ChristyTwoFist, TheHairySwede) and others might find amusing.

Item one - Mr. Hairy Swede, I have been to Fergus Falls, and it's not that exciting. However, I expect that this is where at least one member of Plissken learned his trade, or at least bought his first guitar and I must say, it's not really all that hip.


Item two - while preparing for Grandma's birthday party, we were required to load up the remnants of her old house into my father's pickup so that he could haul it to Minnesota and then to Arizona. We ended up doing it twice because an old oil lamp was packed with the oil intact, which pretty much meant it was inevitable that it would be spilled all over the back of the pickup, meaning we had to unpack, wipe down, and repack the truck. In the course of our packing, we packed this lovely painting that has hung in my grandmother's living room forever. Someday, I had hoped it might be mine, but my sister has beaten me to the punch, boldly writing her name on the back when she was just a kid so that we'd all know it would eventually be passed on to her.

Item three - Jamestown, South Dakota - where Eryn and I dealt up a few hands in honor of Tall Brad.

and then I did a few other things in honor of Tall Brad, like trying to prove I'm almost as tall as him (yeah, that's a really big ball on a really big buffalo).

We also toured the Jamestown historic village while checking out the giant buffalo. Football fans will be excited to know that Jim K. is from Jamestown and recently auctioned off a signed football to benefit the town - going price, $150. Angie Dickinson is also from Jamestown, and this is more interesting to me, because she went to school at Beach and was related to my aunt's first husband, meaning that within my extended family structure you can point at someone who slept with JFK. I've never seen her at a family reunion, but I'm sure it's because she was busy. Anyway, I did not realize that M. Night S. actually based his movie "The Village" on the Jamestown historic village, a fact Ming might be interested in - I captured this proof just for him.

While I was in Jamestown, I figured I might as well play cowboy.

There were more cows/buffalo to be seen, and in keeping with my habit of touching them in inappropriate places, I present the giant cow of New Salem.

Pyramids or Don't Spellcheck This Post

I know I said I wouldn't actually write a review of any of the Terry Pratchett books I'm reading lately, and I'm still not going to - but in his last few books I've noticed his tendency to use language that's beyond my ken. For a short while, I felt that perhaps that English degree and post-grad writing degree had been largely pointless, but then I began to do some research on the latest of the most currently confusing passage I'd read, from Pyramids.

Pratchett writes of the assassins in the assassins' guild, "...and were expected to dance well, and because well-cut black silk and long legs attracted a certain type of older woman, they'd whirled the night away through baubons, galliards and slow-stepping pavonines..." I understand "and" and "legs", but "baubons", "galliards" and "pavonines" are completely unfamiliar. So I went to the web. Galliards and pavonines were immediately forthcoming.

pav·o·nine adj.
Of or resembling a peacock.
Resembling a peacock's tail in color, design, or iridescence.

gal·liard n.
A spirited dance popular in France in the 16th and 17th centuries.
The triple-time music for this dance.
adj. Archaic Spirited; lively; gay.

But "baubon" was problematically elusive. The online dictionaries returned nothing and most of the Google hits fell into three distinct categories (I don't guarantee work-safety):

1. Dildo-related: "The Greeks also had specific words for a dildo (olisbos or baubon)."
2. Some sort of weird-ass collie (like the dog) porn: as in Nataline. Smooth and Rough Collies. Photoalbum. Paimio.
3. Italian on Italian (.it) sites I just simply don't understand, but which is probably related to #1.

Then I decided to concatenate "baubon" with the other dance-related words, and when I added "galliard", I got a hit referencing The Oxter English Dictionary. Wondering if I mistyped Oxford and have perhaps never heard of it? Apparently neither has anyone else who might write a review of it for Amazon - but I'm willing to bet 4:1 that Terry Pratchett has a copy of this "Uncommon Words Used By Uncommonly Good Writers" sitting on his shelf at home and that it possibly doesn't even come with a definition for "baubon", just a note that if you're referring to a dance, you should use the words "galliard", "baubon" and "pavonine". I had a professor once who told me good writers have good tools and this seems to be an exceptional case where you can actually trace specific writing back to the specific tool. Not that I'm calling Terry Pratchett a tool - I like his writing, and the new words he teaches me, even when I can't find them on the web.

Conservative Blog Taxonomy

This will probably be everywhere liberal, but it's wonderful - so I'm doing my part to spread it around a bit, particularly as it highlights the fact that our state has more than its share of right-leaning loudmouths. Fables of the Reconstruction (out of Philadelphia) has provided a handy Conservative Blog Taxonomy. I'm sure everyone will have their favorites, but I personally like:

4. Little Green Footballs - If LGF didn't exist, Dave Neiwert would have to invent it. Heady stuff for young rightwingers, like the Völkischer Beobachter was in the good old days. Site gives off a strong scent of roast pork.

Last Weekend - Sushi and Comedy

I left it up to Pooteewheet to blog about last weekend's sushi at Origami (the Wahoo was absolutely delicious) and our outing to see comedian Nick Swardson. So if you're interested in a sushi review, please redirect yourself. Her timing on the post was perfect, because she talks about her problem with the octopus balls a mere day before The Blotter (via Pharyngula) posted a link to a story about eating live octopus tentacles at The Prince in LA (Korean food, LissyJo - maybe we can have it next Thanksgiving!)

"This is an entity that does not want to be eaten alive, dead or otherwise.
This is, perhaps, even a thing that would happily take you down with it if it
were big enough. This food hates you and what you did to it! "