Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Why I Shouldn't be Allowed to Sit Around Bored

So, I know Mean Mr. Mustard is from California originally and, because of this, I have to base my conception of how he met his wife on my knowledge of California's culture and dating scene, both of which are entirely formed by two sources: Love Connection and Elimidate. This leads me to believe that at some point, either Mr. Mustard was sitting in front of Chuck Woolery, getting the old we'll be back in two and two, while up on the screens were his wife, his ex-wife, and Miss Yolo County 1974, each dissing him for trying to grab a kiss at the door after spilling wine all over at a tacky, faux-hip restaurant, or that at some point, he went out with all three of them and cut a rather sad groove while shirtless at a local dance bar while they competed for his approval by writhing around to see who could do the best facsimilie of a public lap dance, at which point I'm pretty sure his wallet chain, complete with keys, would have really gotten in the way. I don't even want to consider the hot tub part that always comes next.

Am I close, MMM?


MeanMrMustard said...

It's actually much simpler than that. I stalked her.

Anonymous said...

Scott, you are a californian seems like you should know all this as it is an inherant trate being born their.