Weekend Recap - Food/etc.

Did I mention we also went furniture shopping for Pooteewheet's soon-to-be practice, went bike browsing, chased down the cat who escaped because of the aforementioned cardboard cutting getting in the way of the garage door sensors, painted the basement wall, went to get Erwood at my aunt-in-law's I'm married party and fetched the leaf blower from the duplex. A full weekend.

Anyway - food. Saturday night was our big going-out without Erwood night and we decided to hit a sushi place. I've had it a few times, but Pooteewheet never has, except the sushi she made in community education that smelled so fishy I could tell she was bringing it in the door upstairs. I canvassed coworkers, and decided on The Hairy Swede's favorite sushi digs, Midori's Floating World Cafe on Lake and 30th. We invited my friend Kyle because I know he likes sushi and also likes anything new and, of course, the more the merrier (for most things). We consumed:

• Two orders of the Sushi Dinner / Jo (chef's choice - 10 pieces nigiri sushi, 8 pieces California roll, 6 pieces tuna roll)
• A #9 roll
• An order of white tuna

We also had all the pre-meal food (soup, salad, bowl o' rice) and would have had fish eggs if they hadn't been out. In the end, the only thing left standing was the two pieces of egg-topped sushi (which neither Kyle nor I like) and like one piece of California roll. We have to give Kyle credit for much of it as I filled up pretty fast because I ate all my rice and Pooteewheet was having issues with the texture of raw fish after a few pieces.

A review? Compared to Sushi Tango, where I went last time, I have to say I preferred Sushi Tango, and I think it's because their sushi is actually less authentic - that is to say, the pieces were smaller (Midori's has HUGE pieces of fish - I actually had to cut a piece of sushi in half to eat it, and that's a no-no), the octopus was "trimmed" (Midori's does it right, you can see the crunchy tentacles - that's part of the texture and experience, but I prefer my octopus from the center), the turnover on the sushi seemed to be quite a bit higher (Sushi Tango is a pretty big place, Midori's is half a dozen tables and six slots at the bar), which always makes me happier because I know the fish has to stay perfectly fresh, so it's probably coming out of a cooler (and I like my sushi a little crisp), and the beer selection is better (Midori's is pretty much Japanese beer only, but I prefer Summit). Midori's was much more interesting because it seemed like the kind of place you might walk into off the street if you were in Japan, and if you felt like it, you could really watch the chef roll your sushi (one guy, there he was, rolling your plate of food). Was it good? Absolutely. But not good enough that I won't try someplace else (Kyle recommend Origami) next time.

We handled the lack of beer choices issue by going to Town Hall Brewery (check out Scott McGerik's blog for a pretty extensive list of articles about the restaurant - note that he talks about Hoban, the Korean restaurant, as well - which is by my house, close enough to bike there and which Pooteewheet and I discussed yesterday as some place we should go - weird) afterwards and watching Iron Chef while drinking a few of the house beers. At one point, a guy walked up and noted that we were watching Iron Chef and must be desparate for entertainment. He then tried to sell us a (presumably bootleg) copy of Star Wars III (honest) before being run out by the wait staff. When we left, we saw him trying to sneak into the next bar down the road.

Chicago 2006

I had a longer lapse in my posting because Pooteewheet, Eryn, my friend Kyle, and I all loaded into our little car and drove to Chicago for a four day weekend. The trip originated because another friend of mine had casually dropped a message in my email, not even sure it was my email, that he was having a gaming weekend in Joliet. Both Kyle and I, and even Pooteewheet, had gamed with him and his friends back when he was my age and his kids were Eryn's age. Now his kids are graduated and married and he's a grandfather and the kids are playing games with him and his friends. We hadn't seen them for something like fourteen years, so it seemed about time, even if I haven't played Dungeons and Dragons since it was in a previous set of books. We decided we'd play for one day while Pooteewheet and Eryn went to visit Pooteewheet's sister, and use the rest of the days to do some touristy Chicago fun.

So we drove in all day on Friday, taking a break at the Dells to have breakfast/lunch at Denny's. Not the corporate chain, but the small town restaurant that predates the chain that serves a much better omelet. In the evening, we made it past the first Illinois toll road, despite Illinois' attempts to convince us it wasn't possible to ever get through the backed up trafic, doubled back on the advice of a kindly old man at the oasis, then shot south and east to Joliet. It seemed like we spent forever looking for Lou Malnati's Pizza that evening, but it was a pretty good slice of pizza and fulfilled our mission to have some Chicago deep dish. Had we known we'd be eating deep dish for dinner the following evening as well, we might have chosen something else.

We stayed at the Hotel 6 and Joliet which, as we entered, had a woman waiting for a man who pulled up and then paid for their room in cash. It's so romantic when spouses play act.

So Saturday was gaming and went as gaming always does - just a lot of shooting the breeze and catching up. But we did find out Bob volunteers at the Shedd Aquarium, which is where we were going on Sunday, so he called in some complimentary tickets for us and gave us a free parking pass. Gold. However, he greatly confused us when he noted that he had a girlfriend named Nickel the Turtle. At first I thought she might be another volunteer at the Shedd, but she turned out to be an actual turtle in the tank where scuba volunteers maintain their licenses. The Shedd Aquarium is a nice aquarium - lots of animals, and the dolphin tank is amazing. It's so big that you can't see the dolphins on the other side of the tank until they get closer or flip to their white underbellies. Nothing at all like the Minnesota Zoo.

By the way, Bob, if you're reading, the truck stop is not the best place for breakfast in your neighborhood. It's the Route 30 Pancake House, about three miles past the Motel 6. It seems to be run by a Greek family and the menu is extensive, delicious, and includes things like gyros omelets and Hawaiian omelets. I strongly recommend trying it - it was much better than Diamand's.

Back to the Shedd. Eryn was interested in this snake, which is sort of creepy all bundled up there behind her.


I had my picture taken inappropriately touching a giant fish that Amazonians used to hunt to feed their families, but which are now worth too much not to sell instead.


This is more inappropriate fish statue touching. This statue is actually called "Man With Fish", although with me there, it's more like Men With Fish.


Our real reason for going to Chicago was to eat. We stayed in a Hotel 6 to live on the cheap so that we could lay out more for dinner. In particular, we went to try some Chicago sushi restaurants. On Sunday night we went to Kamehachi, close to downtown. Kyle had an oyster shooter. It looked pretty nasty, but he assured me it was good. I stuck with the saki instead. Kamehachi has a nice sampler of sakis. They'll give you three in decent-sized glasses to drink with your meal and you can have the quality or not-as-quality series. The sushi itself was a little on the pricey side, but very good, with some good rolls and even a few styles of white tuna, which seems to be hard to find in Minnesota. Kyle encouraged the waitress to subject him to something new and she brought him a fairly spicey roll and a fish cut from tuna cheeks...an $8 cut - yikes. But cheaper than than $4500 suite you can get on Michigan Ave. in Chicago...so everything just has to be put in perspective.


On Monday we went to the Museum of Science and Industry. It's basically the Minnesota Science Museum if you hopped it up on steroids. There were so many things to see and only about 5 hours to see them. I think we may have covered about 30% of the place. LissyJo will be disappointed to know we didn't get as far as the prenatal development displays. But I did take a look at the anatomical slices. They sliced up two people - one lengthwise, one widthwise - and put the 1" slices between glass. It was rather morbid, but fascinating, to see all the organs and muscles, and even eyelashes. Until you got to the sphincter - that was mostly just nasty. We saw train displays, airplane displays, circus displays, robot displays, genetics displays, castle displays...even the bathroom seemed like a display. There seemed to be over fifty stalls all around the outside and another fifty urinals in the center - it was hard to picture the crowd at the museum when all those would be needed.

Here's Kyle, Pooteewheet and Eryn playing with what's basically a very big EyeGames.


This is Pooteewheet putting her screaming face on a statue at the Enterprise exhibit. Not the Star Trek sort of Enterprise - the industry and marketing kind. Fortunately there weren't too many kids around as this is sort of scary in an Orwellian way. Eryn loved this part of the museum because there was a climbing wall with a soft map that was meant to show how business was like climbing a wall, and video games where the point was mainly to point and click to demonstrate running a business.


There was also a full sized submarine. When they said they had the U-505 there, I pictured it just sort of sitting next to the museum and rusting away, not completely enclosed in a reinforced sub pen within the museum building. The tour was too short, at least compared to the one I had with my Dad in Sydney, Australia, but it was still interesting to walk around it and through it and see all the details about how it had been captured and subsquently moved to Chicago.


And Monday was another night of Sushi, this time at Tsuki, which was considerably fancier, although actually a little less expensive and in an easier neighborhood to park (up by Lincoln Park - we actually found on-street parking). Not that it matters how fancy a place is if you're there around 4:30 p.m., as you're likely to be the only ones in the restaurant (there were kids at both restaurants on the nights we were there - bringing them in early before rush). Kyle tried another oyster shooter and liked the presentation better (below - oyster shell on the side). However, he also tried Oni - sea urchin - and looked as though he might heave. The rolls weren't as good. But the Green Tea ice cream was so good Eryn got her first ice cream headache. The steak Pooteewheet had was delicious for non-sushi folk. And the duck sushi...yep, duck sushi, lightly seared and smoked and laid on rice with some wasabi...was mouth wateringly amazing. Absolutely worth the trip for that alone. Kyle was skeptical about the quail egg on the wasabi tabiko, but enjoyed it after he was eating it. So overall, it was a positive dining experience.



Eryn is starting to get pretty handy with her chopsticks. You can barely see the plastic clip under her fingers to make them into big tweesers, but the night before she was eating her food with no clip and still managing fairly well. She's a big fan of soy sauce.


Monday night we left Chicago and spent seven hours straight driving back to the cities. If we could have avoided the seven lane toll area that routed into 3 lanes on the other side of the toll booths, it would have been 40 minutes faster, but we still managed to get home a bit earlier than I thought we would. Nice thing about owning a Ford Focus with 35 mpg or so is that you only need about a tank and a half to go the whole way, so you don't have to waste time stopping to refuel the car and yourself, if you can stay awake.

Sakura (and more)

We've been doing a monthly dinner event for almost a year now.  We've gotten around.  Tonight we went to Sakura in downtown St. Paul.  I had the Chriashi sushi - it's in the foreground.  K and L are eating primarily appetizers and rolls.  The food was good, although Kyle had the most positive things to say about the whiskey flight they tried before I got there and my sushi was better than Poot's salmon teriyaki, which looked like what you'd order if you didn't like sushi.  She did enjoy her dumplings.  I particularly liked them when I squeezed some orange on them (as in citrus, not simply the color) to complement the soy sauce.

Our historical venues:

• November 2019 (Kyle) - Sakura
• October 2019 (Matthew) - Chimborazo
• September 2019 (Larry) - Mesob (Ethiopian on Hiawatha)
• August 2019 (Scott) - Apoy Phillipino Bistro
• July 2019 (Ming)- Mama Sheila’s Soul Food Kitchen [Buffet]
• June 2019 (Kyle) - Babani’s Turkish
• May 2019 (Matthew) - Winzer Stube German Restaurant
• April 2019 (Larry) - Adelita’s
• March 2019 (Scott) - George and the Dragon [Brunch]
• February 2019 (Ming) -  City Afrique (Poot and I missed this one)
• January 2019 (Kyle) - Peninsula

Outside the restaurant someone had dropped their sushi roll.  Very sad.  I hope it wasn't the Zach Parise specialty roll.  And I assume they dropped it rather than flung it at the wall/ground in anger.


We also made it to the play "Towards Zero" by Agatha Christie this weekend, over at Theatre in the Round. Good play.  I really enjoyed the first 99%.  And then there was a weird Christie twist at the end that made it feel like a bit of a rom com.  The acting was great and her murder mysteries are fun. This one had the motto that the murder should occur at the end of the story.


Kyle gave me a birthday present, a bottle of Ohishi Whisky. 


And Joe gave me a birthday present.  Schematics for a keg and other brewery related items.  I'm going to ask my father in law to frame them for me.  They'll be really nice wall art.  My family got me a cast iron bank.  A dog.  I have a small collection, and it fits in nicely.  Poot says she picked it up in Wisconsin near the cheese shop while on her visit to a friend last month. No picture.  You'll have to trust it looks like a cast iron dog.

Parking Lot Sushi

Really. There's not much more to say about it than "parking lot sushi". It was in the lot at Ring Mountain, being chilled by today's brief snow storm. I could say it was ironic because I was at Origami two nights ago where there was good sushi, but that would be a misuse of the word. Gross is a much better choice. Eryn refused to let me put it on her lemon sorbet, despite that she was at a sushi restaurant drinking Limonata less than 48 hours earlier.

No Legal Marriages, Only Spiritual Ones

This is cool - I wish the Lyndale United Church of Christ would have been around when I was in my churchin' phase around age sixteen - they sound like my kind of people.

"I will no longer sign marriage licenses. Opposite gender couples will have to go to the judge at city hall to have them signed," said Pastor Don Portwood from the Lyndale United Church of Christ.

Members of the 120 year old church in South Minneapolis voted unanimously to support the move. "We have decided that we are no longer going to discriminate against same gender couples, that we will only do religious weddings and religious ceremonies for same gender or opposite gender couples."

This, on the other hand, is not cool: "If you like sushi, you're supporting the world's biggest religious cult." Rew is right, the Wege should be cursed - not for ruining something trendy, just for ruining a little bit of something that's freaking delicious. I look forward to Rew's right up of the best places to eat sushi in the Twin Cities (and Chicago, and NY) that are not funneling money to the Rev. Sun Myung Moon. I find it particularly disturbing that I went to Chicago solely to eat sushi....is nothing sacred? Ah...weddings at the Lyndale United Church of Christ are...hmm...wonder if they have a Moon-less sushi potluck?

Satuday Night - Day #2

Sorry these are a little behind the times - I don't normally touch the computer much while my wife isn't around. I suppose that makes me sort of the opposite of most programmers and/or perverts, but such is the case.

Saturday was gaming day. I met Dan at my place and we drove up to Kyle's in Maple Grove to a.) have breakfast (the cheese in my omelet needed to be meltier, but we finally got to try the place Kyle has been telling us is good for over a year - usually it's either 1.) empty and closed or 2.) surrounded by so many police cars it's a bit unnerving ), b.) play board games and gamble a bit (modified the rules to Age of Mythology with good results - we made all the goals end of turn instead of end of game, Matthew won; played Settlers of Cataan; and played poker and in-between which had over a $40 pot at one point which is always bad news for everyone involved) and c.) drink (during which time I received a call from my mother on my cell phone who, after talking to me about water goblets and being disgusted I couldn't give her a number as to how many were at my house, like most guys can, told me to take a cab home - fortunately it was pretty early in the day and I was done drinking not much later so I had hours and hours to sober up).

I did indeed talk Kyle into sushi at Sushi Tango at the Uptown Mall and even Dan went (he's traditionally anti anything not meat and potatoes), although with predictable anti-sushi results. On the way there (we were in two cars as Maple Grove and Eagan aren't in good proximity) Dan dug through my glove compartment to clean up all my trash and snoop a bit. A couple of minutes later an object goes flying out the window and Kyle quickly backs his Mustang off to avoid being hit - a few other throws follow, but it's obviously nothing car-damaging. When we get to the parking lot I ask if he knows what Dan threw to which he responded, "well, it had a string, was it a tampon?", in response to which Dan and I laughed a lot. It's excellent to know that acting like a sixteen year old is still possible without much effort at all. Dan did make sure to leave behind one emergency tampon in the box.

The Sushi was great (Kyle found Dan some kabobs to actually get him to eat beyond a few bites). I hadn't had much fish egg before and the Wasabied fish eggs were sinus-blowing - literally, I thought I was going to have to do something about my nose. We mosied around Uptown for a while, to the book store and such, while Dan had a smoke outside - he ended up calling Pooteewheet in Chicago to tell her we'd ditched him and he needed my cell number. We pointed out that we had indeed ditched him and were all of about 50 yards away. I'm pretty sure it was the 25 oz. Japanese beer that pushed him into that extremely tired place.

Then home, to watch half of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Chicago, Day 1 - Navy Pier

Our first day in Chicago we went to Navy Pier. That's pretty much all we did. Drove down to the pier, almost got stuck in Memorial Day parade traffic, finally found a $20-some parking spot near the pier, and then enjoyed the pier, the ferris wheel, a cheese borger at Billy Goat Tavern, an architecture tour on one of the boats, and then wandered over to Friends Sushi about half a dozen blocks away.

Probably Eryn's favorite part of the whole day. The fountain just before entering the pier. She made us go back to it later so she could play next to it again. I was glad she was having so much fun, except that the second time round she was melting cotton candy on my leg.


You might have to click through to see the panoramic photos. This one is funny because I caught the same kid twice. It's sort of creepy.


Fun around the fountain:


What's that smell?! No vacation collection would be complete without me inappropriately enjoying the local statues.


Eryn about to check out one of the sailing ships off the pier. She was excited when they touched off their cannon.


Very end of the pier. We were getting in a bit of exercise for the day (I was tired when everything was done for the day as I topped it off by swimming with Eryn in the hotel pool where they were having "Dive In Movies." Ali asked me if I'd be willing to do a mini triathalon with him this year, so I tried a few laps of crawl in the pool. For the next two days my arms felt like they were slightly separating at the shoulder joints).


Eryn enjoying the ferris wheel.


Certainly not The Eye, but up there a ways (I think it's 1/3 the height of The Eye - we were trying to figure it out with Pooteewheet's Android while waiting in line. We bumped into some Eaganites while in line, which isn't nearly as weird as bumping into someone named Eryn two days later in the line at the Jellybelly factory. She had her name printed on her shirt).


Nice skyline picture from the ferris wheel.


Another. In case you can't tell, I really like Lake Point Tower. Looks like I can buy 1000 square feet for around $400K, and a parking spot for another $67-80K. Or if I make it big, it looks like I can get something around 3000 square feet near the top for $1.65 million.


Little hazy the day we were there.


The highlight of the stained glass museum on the pier. Certainly belongs next to the other beautiful pieces in the gallery.


Eryn at the end of the pier. I was dying to go on a bike ride when I realized the bike trail just keeps going down the side of the lake. Next time we're in Chicago if it's not winter, that'll be a priority for me, particularly as the bikes are so easy to rent, or I can just take my own and Eryn and I can start south of the city where getting dropped off isn't a problem. I realize this means Pooteewheet might have to drive around by herself which, given her sense of direction even with her GPS, might be a recipe for disaster, but she could always try to find us again at whatever location we started from.


WHERE IS ERYN'S HEAD??? My superior photography skills at work.


A nice picture of Pooteewheet and Eryn having some fun before the architecture tour.


Architecture tour. That guy talked nonstop for like 70 minutes. Amazing. I learned that if you take a train (Metra) into Union Station, right across the street/river there's a water taxi that will take you to the pier for a fee. Given how much it cost to park at the pier, that might not have been such a bad option.


River City. Bertrand Goldberg's less famous apartment complex (second to the corncobs of Marina City).


This angel is VERY proud of the dump he just took (it's called the Angel of Peace).


Eryn, worried I'm going to do something embarrassing while taking a picture of the Angel of Peace.


Friends Sushi. I had the sashimi platter and tobiko (they offered all the colors of the rainbow) with uzura on it, much to the Facebook disgust of my former classmate Raquel. It was weird tabiko as it didn't come wrapped in seaweed, but was served on scooped out lemon rind. I have to say it was better than the tabiko the next night at Tsuki, and the presentation with the cracked egg shells on top of little bits of lemon was unique.


The inside of Friends Sushi. I wasn't sure it would be kid friendly, but there was a mother and son having sushi right next to us. Eryn and Pooteewheet enjoyed the steak and chicken teriyaki, although Eryn switched with Pooteewheet when she discovered she preferred the steak. She was dubious about going, but wanted to come back the next night. I'll post about it later, but was much happier with Tsuki when we went there on Sunday night.


I took us on a final detour so I could find a four pack of Dogfish beer at a liquor store I knew to exist downtown, and in order to take Eryn past Centennial Fountain which was near the hotel I'd stayed at a few years ago when I was at an educational software conference for work. It was my belief that if she liked the Navy Pier fountain, then she'd enjoy this one as well. It was a very nice place to wind down the evening.


A beautiful picture of the fountain in panorama.


Eryn doing a ballet pose in front of the fountain. There was a big family here right before I took this picture. A bunch of relations were up from Las Vegas and they were having a great time in front of the fountain.


Eryn and Mom having a great time enjoying the end of the day.


NO MERMAIDS ALLOWED IN THE FOUNTAIN!!! Emily Windsnap would be in big trouble (Eryn's book of choice during the trip).


The fountain shoots a jet of water across the river later in the day. A wedding showed up to take pictures in saris and tuxes. Beautiful wedding party and a great place for wedding pictures.


Close up of the fountain, in case you just need some white noise for relaxing:


The fountain shooting across the river as a boat floats by. A very large speedboat (I suppose it was officially a yacht) braved the fountain later and everyone hunkered down under the rain guard to avoid getting drenched. If grins were umbrellas they would have been perfectly safe.

Windy City Burlesque

Kyle, Pooteewheet, and I drove to Chicago last Friday to catch two evenings of the Second Annual Windy City Burlesque Fest.  While it might seem like I have an obsession with burlesque, my purpose was legion:

1.) See Michelle L'Amour, as she wasn't at Midwest Burlesk this year.

2.) Go to Chicago.

3.) See some acts we wouldn't see at Midwest Burlesk.

4.) Have some sushi.

5.) Decide whether a speed trip was feasible for future purposes (we drove back starting at 12:30 a.m.)

6.) Have some beer.

7.) Pick up some beer to bring back that isn't generally available in Minnesota.

Missions accomplished.  It is possible to drive back between 12:30 a.m. and 7:15 a.m., although sleeping in a Ford Fiesta is tricky and you really need a foam cushion cut to fit the seat to door gap if you don't want to wake up with no blood flow to your head.  Chicago is there.  Although Tsuki where we always went for sushi is not.  But all the staff moved to Ai and they still have bento boxes for kids and a great selection of sushi.  I had the tabiko flight (red, yellow, green, black, orange...black is best), a piece of cherry smoked duck on rice, an oyster shooter, a delicious rosemary walnut tuna roll that striped the tuna so every piece tasted different, and a bowl of green tea ice cream the profits of which were sent to Japanese relief funds.

Friday night was....

• beer + dinner
• beer
• burlesque + beer and whiskey
• beer + other

Dinner was at the Duke of Perth.  Good fish and chips, but "all you can eat" is sort of silly given the size of your first plate of fish.  Afterwards we went to John Barleycorn's for a beer while waiting for the show to start.  That's also where we went after the show, although by then we were drinking some Shamrock Shake thing composed of creme de menthe and Bailey's.  Ugh.  You know you've jumped the shark when bright green drinks hit the counter. I did get to tell Franny Fluffer Nutter, who was also there drinking, that we liked her act.  I learned that she does an RPG burlesque and a Twin Peaks burlesque in her native New York.  Those must be amusing.

The burlesque show was fun, although I didn't think it was as good as Midwest Burlesk.  Lula Houp-Garou stood out with her hula hoop act and a dance the second night that involved lying in a bed of glass.  The Stage Door Johnnies were their usual amusing selves with a sort of tin solider act.  Franny Fluffer Nutter was good - you can find her doing her baton twirling and blonde to redhead transition here, although video always lacks significantly compared to the live experience of burlesque.  The Flaming Dames with their ode to music were amusing.  Jeez Loueez brought a lot of energy to the stage with a dance to Prince's Sexy Motherfucker.  Steele Starling was blasphemous with his Catholic priest pole dance to Lacrimosa that ended in an upside down prayer.  And Ammunition...the host described her as an industrial factory wrapped in the body of a girl.  She came out with a couple of Home Depot lamps and a Tron-lightlike corset, and eventually proceeded to use a grinder like you'd expect to see a heavy metal band using grinders, to shoot sparks from their guitars.  But she didn't have a guitar, so she used her g-string.  There's a very short clip of it here...it was much more impressive in person, without the band, and the lights mostly off.

My least favorite act was probably Serenna Starr.  Her act was much more traditional strip (it involved a very large bowl of sudsy water) than burlesque, and it felt less fun because of that.  While it might seem strange to say you don't go to burlesque for nudity or raunchiness, it's the truth.  Even though Michelle L'Amour bills herself as the "most naked woman."  Unless the raunchiness is truly intended to be over the top fun (the Evil Hate Monkey for instance), it just doesn't belong in a burlesque show.

MinneDemo

On Friday night I went to MinneDemo with Erik and Ming at the Intermedia Arts theater. I'd never been to a MinneDemo before, and if you haven't either the rules are that the presenters have to present on working software, have approximately seven minutes to complete their presentation, and cannot use a PowerPoint slide deck.

In addition, there's tons of networking with developers from around the Twin Cities. We bumped into Alan from work there, a friend of Erik's who used to work at Thomson, a guy from SAS who said I looked familiar (e.g. I look like my brother), Ed Kohler of The Deets (a real pleasure to talk to), Peter who used to work at Findlaw and was at CodeFreeze, and some guy who was sort of dressed as a poor man's ninja with a straw hat. For some reason that last guy focused on Ming, so the rest of us didn't have to deal with him. I'm not sure if he's the reason Ming snuck out later without telling us goodbye.

There was also free Surly. A lot of free Surly. I had the coffee and the Furious. The beer alone makes it the best developer event I've been to in a long time.

The presentations were good, at least the first four I saw. There were so many people at MinneDemo that only about 3/4 of them fit into the little auditorium. Even for the first four I was sitting on the stairs. There was a big screen in the entry way, where Erik and I stayed for the second half so that someone else could get a shot at the seats, but it was a bit fuzzy and impossible to hear. Fortunately, you can see them all at Minnov8. Re-searchr looked particularly interesting, albeit a bit slow. But they were streaming the presentations to the entry area, so it might have been a bit congested.

After the beer and the presentations, Erik and I went out for a late dinner at Fuji Ya Sushi on Lake. When we bellied up to the sushi bar, the place was packed. Two hours later we were completely alone. I hadn't been to Fuji Ya before and I strongly recommend the tuna flight (six pieces) and the tobiko wasabi roll that left little fish eggs all over the place. We were there long enough that the sushi chef prepared us a pineapple/strawberry/chocolate-raspberry sauce dessert as a free treat. Just a great evening.

Company Sushi

My company has started to stock sushi in the cafeteria. This is strange. Strange enough that I finally tried some. Nothing fancy, just the seaweed roll slices with rice and tuna, eel, etc, in the center - after getting up to take Pooteewheet to the ER at 3:00 a.m., I wasn't sure my stomach could handle much more.

Verdict - not too bad. Pretty much on par with Lund's, though I can see the chefs cutting the fish at Lund's, so it feels more fresh. I'm not sure if my cubical neighbors would agree with my verdict, having the slight smell of seaweed drifting through their space, but it was a Friday and many of them had half a day off anyway.

It did remind me that I should check what the sushi setup looks like in Florida, however, so that I can try some while I'm there on company business. My coworker is bringing his wife, so I have to find some way to amuse myself, and the beach gets tiring after a while...right?

New Sushi Experience

Erik the Hairy Swede and I went downtown to Fuji-ya (465 N. Wabasha) for a group sushi outing. With TallBrad out of action since his ankle tendon was mysteriously ripped, our business unit abandoning us (mayhap the snow?), our regular group abandoning us, our extended group abandoning us, and my friend Kyle abandoning us, it was...Erik and me. Because it was Fuji-Ya's happy hour, we indulged in several large beers and a variety of your run of the mill rolls and nigiri. However, toward the last order I decided I wanted something interesting, and was going to order both the something interesting and an order of wasabied tobiko, in case the interesting wasn't edible. Erik confessed he had never had tobiko and thought it was larger fish eggs. I assured him it was not, and he aggreed to try it. At which point the waitress said, "With quail egg?"

"What?"

"With quail egg?"

I immediately thought back to last night when I watched the first half of the movie Gozu, and the main character, a Yakuza, had eaten some sort of nasty pasted chicken curd with a quail egg on top, only to get violently ill (and then to question what bodily fluids had been added to the chicken). I looked sufficiently worried.

"It gives it a creamy taste," the waitress assured me, "I won't eat it any other way now."

So I gave in. Particularly as it satisfied two criteria - the tobiko and "something new".

It was good - surprisingly so. I have to admit that it was actually pretty damn tasty and the egg just gave the tobiko another layer of texture and flavor that was enjoyable and not nasty the way mayo with spices in your sushi is nasty. If anyone would have told me when I was younger that I'd like fish eggs soaked in wasabi, wrapped in seaweed, topped with raw quail egg, I'd have told them they'd lost their mind. Now I just say, "yum."

Last Weekend - Sushi and Comedy

I left it up to Pooteewheet to blog about last weekend's sushi at Origami (the Wahoo was absolutely delicious) and our outing to see comedian Nick Swardson. So if you're interested in a sushi review, please redirect yourself. Her timing on the post was perfect, because she talks about her problem with the octopus balls a mere day before The Blotter (via Pharyngula) posted a link to a story about eating live octopus tentacles at The Prince in LA (Korean food, LissyJo - maybe we can have it next Thanksgiving!)

"This is an entity that does not want to be eaten alive, dead or otherwise.
This is, perhaps, even a thing that would happily take you down with it if it
were big enough. This food hates you and what you did to it! "

Chicago 2006 - WebCT Impact

I'm back from four days of educational conference in Chicago. Nice digs - the Sheraton by the lake. Nice conference - I've got 20 pages of notes with ideation all over them. Nice folks. Nice time. I think my primary takeaway, however, is that there is a very large career slice out there I am perfectly qualified for. Good to know.

I flew in on Tuesday morning. I flew in a little early as I wanted to take the train from O'Hare (wait...can't you expense things like a cab, or shuttle?) and get dropped off down town with enough time to hang out, find some lunch at some place within The Loop, and take a short walking tour. It was a good plan, until I stepped off at Clark-Lake and it was raining. Raining a lot. I'm not adverse to getting wet, but I'm certain my suitcase is not waterproof.

And if Clark-Lake sounds familiar, that's probably because you may have caught it on the news. About 3 hours after I stepped out of the station a train derailed and filled the area with smoke, giving 150 people smoke inhalation problems. Two of them were still in critical care four days later. I guess they found their way out of the station by the light of their cell phones. If I hadn't been interested in finding lunch, there's the chance I'd have been there with them. It wasn't the worst thing I heard about while I was in Chicago - I'd give that prize to the four 20-somethings that beat a teenage kid with his own prosthetic leg. He's scared to go outside now - go figure.

As it was, I was in the rain, cell phone stashed where it wouldn't get wet. Hiding out under the canopy to the stairs to the train, I consulted my map and then hopped from door to door in what I hoped with the correct direction. It was correct enough to get me to a Dunkin' Donuts within a block. I remember something Erik or Kyle said to me, "People in Chicago swear Dunkin' Donuts coffee is as good as Starbucks." Bullshit! I had a lot of Starbucks over those four days (the conference supplied it) and there is no comparison. However, it was drinkable, and I hung out for an hour and a half sipping an enormous cup and eating a steak sandwich until the rain quit.

When it did, I hightailed it to the hotel. Although the rain was gone, it was still very humid, and I finished my walk, hauling a huge suitcase behind me, looking like I'd been standing in the rain - except it was sweat, not rain. But, for $179 a night, you get a shower and lots of air conditioning - as it should be.

The trip back was also by the Blue Line and also threatened to rain, although it didn't start until I actually got to O'Hare. But it was in the 90s and humid, so I'm not so sure rain might not have been a bit soothing.

Enough of the travel arrangements...what did I do? Enumeration is in order...

1.) Drank beer - WebCT had beer at their opening reception (Goose Island Brown, not just Bud Light) and an open bar at the evening reception on Navy Pier. They (with the help of Microsoft) rented the end of the pier and provided lots of food, alcohol, and entertainment (jugglers, artists [see my picture on the previous post], fortune tellers, dancing). Yeah...dancing. The head guys at WebCT and Blackboard are pretty young and actually took up the task of encouraging dancing by participating and offering free iPods for dance contestants winners - the result being scores of dancers (there were 1300 people at the conference, so maybe that's not impressive, but it looked like a lot of people), many of them wearing balloon hats and limboing under guys with stilts. I did not dance - waiting for my picture to be drawn took a long time (I had to swap beer fetching duty with some kids from South Dakota).

2.) Drank some more beer - I found a four pack of Dogfish Head 90 Minute Imperial IPA. I once heard it was the best IPA anywhere. Probably the strongest as well at 9% ABV. I couldn't drink all of it before I checked out (literally, from the hotel, not as in "passed out"), which made me sad. It's Kyle's fault for cancelling going with me - he could have drank half the four pack and I'd have been less waste/ful/ed.


3.) Sushi. Kamehachi was two blocks from the hotel. The sushi and sashimi plate with sake sampler were excellent. Being their all by myself, not so excellent - once again, damn you Kyle. I also had the super white tuna, which made me feel a little guilty as I'd watched 30 minutes of a Secret History of KKK special that morning, but as far as I know, fish aren't racist. There was also a nice Indian restaurant, two other sushi bars, two liquor stores, a groccery store, tapas, Thai, and four other places all within two to three blocks.

For the lady at the table next to me, if you read my blog...it is rude to discuss the fact that you're having marriage issues because your food family food budget is $55 a day and you like to eat $30 seared tuna filets sometimes more than once a day. $1800 a month for two people? Your husband should have a problem with your behavior.

4.) Architecture tour via the river. I always wanted to go on an architecture tour of Chicago. I now know many many things about Chicago skyscrapers. For example, I like this building, because it's exactly as old as I am. I am also jealous of anyone who can afford two apartments in this building, as it's possible to remove the wall between them and occupy an entire node/petal, gaining a 270 degree view of the lake and Chicago. Sammy Sousa apparently did this. The park in the foreground is the future site of a park/memorial, but is currently plagued by radioactive dirt (thorium). I didn't go there, but there was a nice couple who had jumped the fence sitting nearby dangling their feet over the wall. Young, soon-to-be-mutants, love. I assume they hadn't been on the tour.


This picture taken through a fountain, is of a typical Chicago skyscraper, invented by Chicagoans in their second skyscaper period. You can recognize them by their seriously boxy shape with little ornamentation, like the IBM building.


I noticed this in a window as we boated by. I'm not sure who she is, but she looks familiar. I thought she might be a suffragette - but maybe she's that Mrs. O'Leary character. If you know, leave a comment.




This is just an excellent name for a boat.


5.) Superman - bleah. Any bad guy who has to rely on crystals as his modus operandi is immediately emasculated. I liked the (spoilers!) Aquamen on the pjs of Superman's kid. I liked the casually dropped reference to how to portray Superman in the lifestyles section of the paper (a nod to gay people who like Superman). The rest...not so much. And did they really do their science? Wouldn't indestructible sperm be a serious problem? Can Superman control the ejaculation speed - after all, it's an involuntary function (the actual ejaculating, not the process of getting there). Less disgusting - how do crystals create an island without pulling the energy from somewhere. An EMP-like pulse - no way, even it is sucking in all that energy. I'm pretty sure that to create a mountain from scratch (energy), you'd need to cool the rest of the planet to just about freezing, or worse.

6.) Pirates of the Carribbean, Dead Man's Chest. Much better! Just a lot of fun - put me in mind of seeing Indiana Jones movies as a kid.

Speaking of Pirates, there was a Pampered Chef convention at the hotel at the same time as my convention. Those women are trouble. They read my badge out loud to me a few times on the elevator (I couldn't figure out if this was flirting), ate popcorn in the movie theater without using their hands and snickered about it, and made dirty noises when Orlando Bloom lost his shirt.

A note to Kevin, who wondered who would attend Little Man: apparently anyone given a free ticket by the local radio station - I counted about 30 people.

7.) "There are many ways to slice that pig" is not an appropriate presentation metaphor in a room where 5-10% or more of the individuals in attendence may be Muslim or vegetarians of some sort. Particularly not if you follow it up with a demonstration slide of said pig.

8.) Mary Levan called my room and left me "love, hugs and joy" and asked me to meet her at Millenium Park for the concert - she had a front row seat for me. She heard from my "mommy" and she "loves me" - that's nice. I wish I knew her.

9.) There is a formula for sleep. It is Enya + Robert Frost + Introspective Portfolio Blog-like content mixed in, all presented via Powerpoint. Good presentation overall, but damn...

10.) WS-XXX does not look like an abbreviation for "various webservices", it looks like an abbreviation for the web service standard for porn delivery.

11.) If you're at a convention you should not treat the public toilets like you would one at home. If the match you lit doesn't cover the smell, you shouldn't have been making the smell in a public place. Also, when you whip it out at the urinal, do it facing the urinal, not at a 90 degree angle, and then turn to the urinal. I'd consider it showing off, but mine's bigger.

12.) Women from Texas are very friendly, I met several who just came up to talk, and they didn't even know each other, so it wasn't like a group of them taking pity on the solitary Minnesotan sitting by himself. I also learned that Odessa sucks.

13.) I read two books while I was at WebCT. Both mentioned "technology so advanced it's like magic". So I went to Superman and they used the same damn line. That phrase has officially jumped the shark. And crystals are not technology like magic. They're just dumb.

Friday Night Bachelorhood - Day #1

So I got comped a half day of free time by my director today - he actually told me to take the whole day off, but I had some "fun" things to do at work, so I logged some time creating a proof of concept and helped one of the guys on my primary project with some things he had on his plate. But half a day was more than enough to log some quality time with myself while Pooteewheet and Eryn are in Chicago. I...

Went to Sin City - I liked it, I actually liked it a lot, even thought it was a bit of the old hyper violent. It was a combination of Kill Bill and the comic book-type movie I expected Hellboy to be (but which it wasn't, at all, not even a little bit – although in a side note, Pooteewheet and I watched Storytelling during the week, which also stars Selma Blair, but a very naked Selma Blair – regardless, it sucked). Elijah Wood was downright creepy – definitely not Spiderman. The Bruce Willis/Jessica Alba portion of the movie that they seem to be pushing in all the promos was actually the least interesting bit – I assume it’s getting play because it’s Jessica Alba in a cowboy outfit – or most of a cowboy outfit (it’s sort of missing the buttocks area – you’ll see what I mean if you go to the movie instead of the trailers). I can see why some critics didn't like it, but I still did. There was also a trailer for the new Star Wars movie (Revenge of the Sith). Now I will admit what Mean Mr. Mustard already suspects - I am a die hard, woad in the wool, sci fi geek when it comes right down to it. I don’t generally publicize the fact to anyone but my wife, daughter and closest friends, but I'll watch anything sci fi- related with the hope that there's something, anything, redeeming about it - hence my argument with Ming about the sheer quantity of snake-related movies I've watched in my lifetime. That said, I really had absolutely no preconceptions about whether I'd be interested in the third Star Wars movie, after all, I thought the first two were incredibly boring. But after the trailer, I’m excited. Explosions. Space ships. Fights. Just big happenings overall. I found myself mesmerized by the trailer and excited that it looked so much better than the new Battlestar Galactica (which I don’t watch – for instance, here I am typing while it’s on in the other room, unwatched). Ming, I know I ditched you for my own selfish, I-got-time-off-and-no-family reasons today, but when Star Wars comes out, we should arrange a movie day.

After the movie, I had some quality time with Sandy (the dog, not my project lead), and then went on a 5.6 mile bike ride. It took me a while to get all geared up – inflate the tires, find my tools and spare and water bottle, long winter underwear, head band, gloves, sweats, shorts and t-shirt, only to discover it was too damn warm for all that stuff and much of it had to come immediately off of my body. Now 5.6 miles doesn’t seem like very far (especially given that my odometer says my last ride was 40.6 miles) – pretty much just to work for me – and I realize that and I knew when I started that I wasn’t going to be able to do much more than that, so I took it upon myself to inflict some brutal self-flagellation by actually biking the hills on Diffley. I’ve lived in Eagan two (2) years and never taken those hills. Hills leading to those hills – sure, but not those particular, seemingly-endless hills. And, if you count the incredibly steep hill that actually caused me to lift my front tire off the ground going up it (it was a little trail in the middle of the second hill that went behind a bunch of houses and ended in a dead end at the bottom of a steep hill), I rolled up five large hills on my ride. Yeah, most of it was in 1x3 or 1x1, but I climbed them, and without walking. There’s no hope I’ll do 100 at the Iron Man (third week of April), but at least I won’t bonk on a 30.

I went to dinner at Chang Mai Tai (Khap, Khun, Khrap! as they say – but don’t take Steve’s and Renee’s review to heart – the food is delicious, the prices are reasonable for anything in Uptown/Downtown and the wait staff is great, albeit eclectic, and if it’s important to you that your wait staff is attractive, I’m pretty sure even Pooteewheet is attracted to the Asian waitress that is always working whenever I’m there) in Uptown. The plan was actually to hit a movie at the Landmark – but the only thing I was interested in was Born Into Brothels, and it wasn’t until 9:30, so I just called it dinner. That also put sushi at Sushi Tango out of the picture, because after a meal of Muslim Thai Curry (two potatoes, two chicken breasts, a bowl of rice and sauce so spicey it has to make my stomach ache a little or it’s not worth it [a three on their scale] – oof), I couldn’t move immediately to anything else. But not to worry – sushi places are generally open until 1 a.m., so I should be able to talk someone into going tomorrow (or just go by myself). I also read 32 pages of Out while I was at dinner – it’s not the best book I’ve ever read, at least so far, but then I’m only 10% into it and it’s a translation from Japanese.

Then, back home to spend more quality time with the dog and watch The Rules of Attraction, courtesy of Netflix and James Van Der Beek. I didn’t like it. There was some good acting and some good production – but it was mostly pretentious (bunch of backwards film, split film, cut short scenes, etc.) and depressing (and oversexed, but then I guess that might be true-to-life for most college students). It centered on what basically amounted to bacchanalia at an “end of the world” party and three characters who f-ed up finding love leading up to that party. Primarily, it was disturbing because James Van Der Beek engages in 1.) imagined man love (he’s the target of a masturbatory fantasy), 2.) several sad attempts at suicide that culminate in him doing nothing more than wetting himself and 3.) extended masturbation to “Afternoon Delight”.

Of course everything culminated in a beer tasting and blog writing festival. Go figure.

Burlesk

Every once in a while I get it in my head to do something I wouldn't normally do, like attend Point Break the Play. This week I felt I was long overdue and I noticed in some of the local papers that the Midwest Burlesk show was playing Thursday through Sunday at the Ritz Theater, right next to the 331 (home of Liberally Drinking). It fit the bill, and I pinged Kyle to ask him if he'd go. He was game, so we decided to make it a full Thursday, and hit Origami for sushi, and then the show.

Sushi was great, and the highlight was trying Monkfish liver, which the menu touted as the foie gras of the sea. Fortunately, I can't picture anyone trying to force feed a monkfish, which is why I don't eat real foie gras. I wasn't sure what to expect and was pleasantly surprised. It was smooth, with a slight tang from the lemon and sauce, and had a light fish flavor that wasn't at all like eating a piece of fish fat. Just a light, sea flavor that you hear about on Food TV, but never really bump into if you're not a world traveler or living in Seattle. Delicious. And that machine with the two bottles sticking out of it. That's a sake warmer. I guess I should have known that, but I've always been a cold sake sort of guy.

On to the burlesque (burlesk). I realize that no matter how I explain this, there's likely to be a wide swath of people I know who think, "I don't care what he says. That must have been lame. He was drunk. Or an idiot. No. I know Scott. It was both." I'm not denying I'm an idiot. I'm not denying I was drinking. The Ritz Theater had a wide selection of wines and beer and I had some great Angry Planet Pale Ale from Flat Earth Brewing. But the show was wonderful. Truly spectacular. Seriously. Damn. Fun.

One of my early memories is staying in a hotel and how excited my parents were to discover that on pay television there was a burlesque show. Despite how young I was, they let me watch the show and told me about seeing live shows when they were younger. There was a guy singing about being the top banana, and later in the show a woman came on the screen to do her act. My mother was ecstatic that she was a tassel twirler, and when the woman gave evidence to how she could twirl in both directions at once, my mother was visibly and vocally happy about how professional she was because it took real talent to twirl appropriately. The Midwest Burlesk show gave me an idea of why having seen live shows when she was younger would have been such a memorable event.

My favorite acts of the night were:

Nadine Dubois - the emcee for the night. Funny. Sexy (I never thought I'd say that about someone in sparkly red lipstick). She sings. She does burlesque. She makes jokes about whiskey and cowbells. She was engaging from front to back and really pulled the show together.

The first act - I don't know who they were, but a strip tease done in snowmobile suits, furry hats, and other accoutrements. Hilarious.

Foxy Tann and the Wham Bam Thank You Ma'ams - great dance moves, afros and Hendrix's Foxy Lady. Some serious cheering from the audience.

Ned the Magnificent - not really a stripper. He was the comic entertainment. He did a superman schtick with a folding chair that was great.

Boylesque Hot Toddy - not quite equal time for the guys. But I point out this member of Belmont Burlesque of Chicago (who also had a great red head doing an act) because his act was so classically burlesque and done so well. The audience seemed to be about 60/40 women, so his act was well met. Four of the women from Belmont Burlesque came out with very large pillows and did a dance, then met in the middle of the stage and brought the pillows together in a 2x2 formation as Boylesque stripped behind the pillows. Left - lots of flesh, hat on head. Right - lots of flesh, hat on head. Front, with the fedora strategically placed.

Fanny Tastic - Fanny came out dressed in a very shiny flight attendant outfit, carrying a flight case, the sort your mother converted into a makeup case, or a storage container for old photos. She bent over and pulled out a belt and demonstrated how to prepare for your fight. Pulled out a can of coke and poo pooed it in favor of a bottle of Jack Daniels. Then did an amazingly athletic dance.

Michelle L'amour - I saw Michelle on television when she was doing her balloon dance on America's Got Talent. The Hoff and company ruined her gig which seemed silly when they made fun of her not-for-family-viewing antics, because she did the balloon dance during the burlesque show, floating away several pieces of clothing, and it was funny and sexy at the same time. But that wasn't the highlight. The highlight was her show-closing performance. Michelle had a large heart rolled out on the stage that looked like it was covered wth your grandmother's old, green couch. She did a great burlesque dance on stage that then moved to the heart, which had posts around the outside so she could do some acrobatics along the sides and top. Just when you thought she was done, more clothing came off, her champagne glass turned out to be full of baby oil instead, and hands shot out through the heart-couch to rub in the baby oil. Kyle put it well. He said it was like a fireworks display. You kept expecting the end, and she kept upping the stakes. This is the part where you think I'm crazy, or a perv, but you had to be there to see it to appreciate just what a show it was.

They're sold out for Friday and Saturday, but tickets are still available for Sunday (and Lily's Burlesque does regular shows at Bryant Lake and Michelle L'amour in Chicago) and it's definitely an event you can bring a date to (and many people did).

Chicago

Sorry about that hiatus. I was in Chicago for the weekend, or what's close enough to Chicago to count in horseshoes. Kyle and I went out there on a three-day weekend to play games with old friends, eat some sushi at Kamehachi, and eat breakfast at the I-30 cafe which has an excellent cup of coffee and a killer greek omelet with feta and gyros.

Gaming is gaming, so not much to talk about there. I spent most of the weekend recovering from being sick last Wednesday. I got over the sore throat, but the congestion wouldn't go away. In the morning I was clear, and then it just got worse and worse all day until the evening when it was like I was sitting in the middle of a field full of ragweed.

The highlight of the weekend was actually missed by Kyle and me (we were off to sushi by that point, watching some little kid sit outside the VIP room with his arms cross, an exaggerated frown on his face, and his body pointed alternately toward the wall or the restaurant, depending on who was watching. He may have just been crabby about the 20-some year old guy who was sporting mutton chops. WTF? I think the only time that's appropriate is if you're reenacting Sherlock Holmes mysteries for a living). Seems that the same gamer who backed up a toilet at our last gaming event with this group backed up a toilet again. But this time it was in one of the other gamers brand new house.

So new it didn't have a plunger.

Two of the other (young) gamers (i.e. college age children of the gamers we used to game with) had to go find plunging equipment so the gaming could continue. I think people should just start announcing, "I have to go take a xxxxx." Or he needs to learn how to flush a few times in the middle.

Here's a story for Kyle. I'm guessing he'll know why I didn't share it mid-trip. Primarily because I didn't want to deal with it for the next 48 hours, because I deserved it. Instead of giving him the truth, I told him I forgot my tooth paste. But what's this? Theres toothpaste in my leak-proof, plastic sundries bag. I just seem to like the generic stuff.


Then again. Maybe not. This is a disgusting way to be proactively concerned about my wife's health. Fortunately, it had a warning on it, so I didn't just make do with whatever I had in a tube.


Speaking of disgusting, white things that you shouldn't put in your mouth...I bought this iced, honey bun for Kyle because it was on sale right inside the door of one of the gas stations on the way home. They make them near St. Louis if you ever want to pick up a box. It actually looks considerably more disgusting in person. Like someone took a big, white, moist dump in a plastic bag; not like what you'd picture if you were thinking about an iced, honey bun. It's so moist you can see the water droplets beading up inside. I did a very good job of not snickering while I bought it, just so I could leave it on Kyle's car seat. The cashier comped me a penny so I didn't have to get lots of change back. I'll always wonder if that was some sort of nod to the fact that I was the first person to buy one. And at only about 550 calories per serving, it might be worth picking up a few dozen in order to survive the post apocalypse.


Finally, this was in my Wisconsin Dells guide book. Kyle thinks it makes them look like the victims of some fetish gone horribly wrong. I think they were just a little overzealous with the chocolate iced honey buns.